before a journey

It's all begin with a raw, pure , burning belief. The image that a child build when he was young. The inception . That s how everything in his life will be lead to.

However, in his journey, the child learn. He get more clear of his purpose, understand the route that he can go, an find it gradually easier to get to the goal

But the desire, should be the same, should be young, powerful and help him hang on whenever he need it.

Ted has quite a journey with his psycho romantic sense, begin by keep saying "I love you " to the girl he just met to some one stay quite calm when his bride left him on the wedding day. A lot cooler, and still cute.

I want to watch every episode, laugh and learn and navigate people. But I also want to experience it. The most impressive thing I ever say to a guy is that: I want to do a lot of things before I die. Yeah. That s gonna be my purpose.

I have the pure belief inside, that the world is a beautiful place , the people I meet will be incredible, lucks will happens and human are always kind. I gonna twist facts to make it into what I believe, no matter what. And there is love, I want to believe.

I ve always been shy, ever since I was small, cause I stuck to the idea that I AM INFERIOR. oh, still, yes I am, inferior.But That give me the reason to move on, not to stand alone and scare. The happiest moment in my life, is when I feels like Im good at something, I can handle things. It s not happen all the time, and I m losing the motivation to make it happen. That s the original reason for any change I wanna make. I will go to wind and storm, dare to do crazy thing for that feeling. I am a thriller.

I am sorry Im still that unstable and always in need of something else. But I m looking for commitment , in my way to find stabilization. I need to keep my head down to earth, control my daily activities, take some responsibility, work hard all day and sleep well, really have some emotional breakdown, so I can be really sympathy with people. That is the plan.

No, I have no plan of hanging around, taking picture, or meeting boys. I just hope that I find true friend, who personality I can learn, I who understand what I talk, without too much effort. Thus my life would be nice, as I can be myself with somebody.

That is about the journey, what's about what I left behind?

I am so so happy that my little sister act nice and mature lately. She may thought that she is mature , but because she never show it to me, I have no proof and keep worrying. I just hope that my leaving, the leaving of a big sister, who took all the cute , favorite kids of mom and dad ( that's what she thinks) will help.

Mom and dad, yeah, they will have alot to worry. But I will make them proud. I wanna be surprise of my self as well.

Friends? I have this very wet thought lately: God will always be in our heart. No matter where I go, I take this small piece of heart with me. And yahoo, of course, yei 3G!

I have this cute gang at school for along time. Some of them I adore, some of them always in my head, even if I want to take him out. I forget all the mess between us, and really hope he do well. As long as he find it happy, do it his way. Destiny of an pubic accountant I guess.

Anyway, remember my favourite idol lately Lizzy of Afterschool, future queen of variety show? Some body say: "I wonder who can hate her". That is what I want to be talked about too. Sorry, too blondy, but yes, thats me. The sad stories mean that I have to keep trying, I havent work hard enough to be a cool person, have not behave well enough and have not take care of my friend enough. Truth is, I have never try to talk with the trouble guy un til its too late to say anything.

I also left some guys ;)) I know you are good, just that I'm not ready to give up my freedom. I wanna wait for something worth it. Dont get me wrong, romantic and cute doesnt means an easy target. By the way, dont just give up like that, I know you not need it that bad, but, dont think girl are difficult, or, too good for you. That's stupid. If you want it, do something, if your girl need persuasion, take it slow and consistent. If its really desperate, keep your head high and cool. Be a man. And talk to me, I will do the consulting.

 too much blah blah already :)