AGH

Today I get to school in a lousy mood, not active, not cool at all. And I figure most of the time I am like that. So I met friend at class, we say hello , lousily, then he turn into another person and talk. Suddenly I feel mad, not mad mad, just abit annoying. After class i leave, still feel bad. I often feel bad without a clear reason, obviously my brain didnt function well. So after a long day, until now, I know the problem. It's jealousy, that my friend can communicate, can think of stuff to chat about, when i m sitting there, do nothing. So jealous, i know im not here to sit in my chair, listen and do nothing, but im still the one holding myself back let laziness control.

Time when I do too much, time when  do too little, i prefer too much. Thank you.

Communication is my problem at home, but here, the obstacle raised. What ind of stuff to talk in random everyday cases, I have no idea, like, open a chi chat with the one sit next to you, when to say "excuse me, can I sit here " or what's next to say after you have talked about name and major and where you from.

Furthermore, sustain a relationship with a person you have gained good impression is difficult. Do I suppose to taxt them ever now and then? Or ask them out? Treat them with food? Oh, it s so much easier at home, i guess, people met all the time at class.

I guess as I question and concern about the matter, I would find a way to improve it. FIY I havent have a standard chat with anyone in English here, except for some text message to the friend dedicated at the beginning.